EXPLORING THE CONCEPT OF PURE LOVE

Pure love is it really possible?

Interestingly I have written this topic under my travel blog. As according to me, we cannot move an inch forward in spirituality unless we trespass this zone- pure love.

Meditating on God

And now before exploring the concept of pure love, let us understand what we meant by the term “pure”. Dictionary meaning of ‘pure’ is –not mixed with any other substance or material. But if we talk in the respect of emotions, then ‘pure’ would certainly imply those emotions, which are above heretical, ordinary and contamination. As the term “pure” suggests, even if small impurities seeps in, it will cease to be pure.

     Now in this context of pure love, let us discuss the major emotional trauma, the most talked about, most hyped and most consuming emotion in our lives. I am going to use the term ‘real love’ instead of pure love, as it is too conceptual emotion to be experienced, whereas the “real love”, is what we are familiar in reality.

     I would stick myself to only interpersonal relationship between the two human beings, which can be labeled as the ‘real love’. It does not come alone, with it comes multitude of emotions, desire, passion, lust, expectations, disappointments, envy and pain. Everyone falls in love and it is a solely desired emotion especially at a certain age. Some by peer pressure, some by their own choice, but we all do it, I mean fall in love, and savor its magic.

   LOVE usually refers to inter-personal relationship, an experience felt by a person for another person. It often involves caring for or identifying with a person or a thing. Some called it an abstract and complex emotion; some describe love as of an absolute value. The person can said to be in love if he values an object, a principle, or a goal greatly and is deeply committed to it, and everything other than that, seems trivial to him. It is a more potent sentiment than a simple attraction. Love is the most fundamental drive of every living being. We cannot be happy without satisfying this desire to love, and we will not be able to perfectly fulfill this desire without permitting its expansion to the most inclusive extent.

Wise quote

   In the first stage a child loves his parents, then his brothers and sisters, and as he grows up he begins to love his family, society, community, country, nation, or even the whole human society. But the loving tendency remains unfulfilled until we know who the supreme beloved is.

   Now the question is "what is real Love"? And why this emotion consumes us from time to time. It has got the capacity to take us up to new horizon, and also opens up a new plethora of emotions. One seems to forget everything when in love, and we mistook it to ‘Real love’, as it seems so real at that moment, that everything else seems imitation.

    All forms of ‘Real love’ are viewed as varying combinations of  certain emotions attraction, passion, caring, desire, laced with sexual longings. This is all said over and over again, but my questions are -

If it’s so strong, and most valued sentiment in our life, than why we let it go?

Why it disappears, and leaves behind annoyance, frustration and pain?

Where it goes and why it does not stay if it is real?

    I think as the name suggests, ‘real' is that, which should always be there and not subject to change in context of time and place, like "truth" it should be consistent and unconditional, but on the contrary it turns out to be otherwise.

    We have seen even the place plays an important role, as the saying goes “out of sight, is out of mind”, is generally true. The time and space are very crucial in love affairs, as rhetorically speaking human mind is capable of only brief recollections.

     Unconditional love is so different from the kind of love most of us have experienced in all our lives that it deserves both a name ‘Real Love’ and definition of its own:

  Real Love is caring about the happiness of another person without any thought of what we might get in return for ourselves.  It’s also the Real Love when other people care about our happiness unconditionally or not because, when other people love us for doing what they want. We can be certain that we’re receiving ‘Real Love’ only when we make foolish mistakes, and fail to do what other person want but still they don’t feel disappointed or irritated. That is ‘Real Love’ -true unconditional love, and this true love alone has the power to heal all wounds, bind people together, and create relationships quite beyond our present capacity to imagine.

 Is the lack of this unconditional love causes anger and confusion in our relationships?

  Maybe this is true, as lack of this unconditional love is causing frustration, that’s why we are witnessing rising divorce cases in today’s world.  unless we get back same amount of love in return, this love is out of question. And it would also be very wrong to mistook real love with attraction and passion, as both are physical desires borne out of sex. It is like you wish to possess, what fancies you, but it fails to hold you long and loses its charm afterwards. This love can happen many times in life. So cannot be mistaken with true love, which as name suggest should never fades.

    Ego plays an important role in this 'imitation' love, one just cannot take rejections from another partner, and so this love affair leads to heartbreaks and sometimes overblown miseries.

      Real love should not be mistaken with 'commitment' also, which can be better than imitation love but it is doubtful if it could survive the hardships of life, as it survives only on give and take basis. Suppose one partner fails in his commitment, can another one accept it lovingly? I doubt it very much.       

Brain power 

     Most people spend their entire lives trying to fill their emptiness with this 'Imitation Love’, but all they achieve is an ever-deepening frustration, punctuated by brief moments of superficial satisfaction. This lack of ‘Real Love’ gives way to the frustration we experience as we desperately and hopelessly try to create happiness from a wobbly foundation of Imitation Love.

    The beauty of ‘Real Love’ is that it is fulfilling and eliminates our anger, confusion,  pain and has the capacity to take us to the pinnacle of contentment. But one never gets this real unconditional love in life as expectations seeps in relationships, and which eventually gave birth to anger, confusion and frustration.

It is like a beggar asking alms from another beggar, both are empty handed and has nothing to give.

    This so-called ‘true love’ evaporates with time, once the gratification of senses is achieved. Generally the entire residue left is grudges, complaints and intense pain.

   From all this aforesaid discussion, we have reached a point that ‘real love’ is an amalgam of all pure emotions, something very pure, very sublime, and which no human being has got the capacity to give.

Then who can give such 'sublime' love?

Only God can give us this form of unconditional love or sublime love.

Praying to God is the ultimate form of Love

GOD is pure love.         

How can we receive this pure love?

Where we can find God or who can show us the path to reach HIM.

   To get the answers of questions would automatically lead us to a person, who knows the path and is well versed in this subject- GOD.

  And mind you, who knows all this better than the spiritual teacher or Satguru.

Guru is the mediator between “GOD and a seeker” only he can help us in our search of ‘pure love’- GOD.

Pics from web files.